Before I had the twins I was certain I wouldn’t be the mom who dresses her kids in matching outfits. I figured doing so would require a lot of organizational drawer-stuffing and planning that was beyond me.
For some strange reason however, I have a natural tendency towards dressing them in similar, yet complementary looks. For example, one in black and white stripes, the other in black and white polka dots. It turns out that this is the more complicated way to dress them. It involves more elaborate shopping and takes more effort to organize. Dressing twins the same actually requires less effort, as far as mental labour is concerned. It’s only one decision to make, and then repeat.
In retrospect, I don’t know why I thought getting them dressed would be any different than all the other twin-parent decisions, like what kind of high-chair to get, and what sort of bottles they’d need. Matching outfits at this point makes practical sense.
Being that they’re not identical twins, this may only last so long. One already has larger feet than the other, so I’d assume they won’t always wear the same size. Furthermore, they’re likely to have their own ideas about what they like, so I know my future includes two wardrobes for them, not a single shared one. The reality for twins is that they are two separate people, with distinct personalities. Ours showed their personalities right out of the womb. It is natural to assume they’ll have not only their own sizes, but their own tastes, and once they can demand what to wear each day, I don’t think it will be fair to try to shoehorn them into one identity.
I have found myself many times struggling to ensure I treat the twins fairly, providing them each with equal cuddle time, play time, and sing-songs. I want them to get equal nurturing along the way. Buying them identical clothing is an extension of this; it ensures they are being treated the same. But over time, will it cause them to struggle with feeling like an individual? At a certain age clothes become how we tell the world who we are, and it’s then I can see the trials and tribulations of dressing twins becoming more than just a problem of aesthetic and convenience.
We’re a few years out from squabbles about clothes of course. I wonder if they’ll go through phases where they want to dress alike, and phases where doing so will be an outrageous suggestion? I guess I should do it now, in case they flat out refuse later. Might as well get it out of my system.
I can imagine a moment where I am exasperated at the two of them arguing over who gets to wear the green sweater to the high school dance. I’m sure by then they won’t want to dress the same. Perhaps one will be punk and the other a prep. One will be into comfort, the other into trends. Who knows? Maybe they’ll be into figuring out ways to dress in similar, yet complimentary looks.